— OPEN UP MY RIBCAGE

[eusford]

credit

a open post/meme overflow post for crowley to help quench the thirst of others

rules
good with gen, shipping, and smut.
i don't ship crowferi though. i'm fine with gen and dark stuff but please don't ask for anything shippy/smut related for those two.
open to friends and people that have threaded with crowley.
link all images and warn if they're nsfw/graphic.
if you have an au idea you can always put it here!
please specify if you'd like him as a human or i'll default to vampire.

stuff i wanna play
mechanic au! crowley can still be a vampire for this or human just... give me mechanic au.
i want stupid space shit so bad y'all just punch me.
high fantasy au!! yes crowley is a paladin and not a knight templar shut up don't @ me
witcher au. i'll give my first born to whoever will play this with me.
history teacher crowley.
college au is also fine with me.
give me dark and grim shit that'll make me go to sleep knowing i made bad life choices.
nier:automata-like au?!?!? SHUT UP I'LL MAKE THIS WORK SOMEHOW.

Comments

[apatheia]

i'm ready for worst operator

here he comes my dude

[eusford]

[ "2B has landed on the surface approximately five hours ago."

"Yeah."

"Have you contacted her?"

"No."

After a thorough conversation with the Commander and being reminded of the importance of 2B's success on Earth, Operator 13O reluctantly returns to his desk. The other operators seated around him are already taking care of their own YoRHa members, disinterest evident in his features as he tries to ready himself to do the same thing for hours. ]

2B. [ His announcement is abrupt, video flickering to life as the android's pod hovers in front. His voice doesn't have much life to it and is accompanied with his usual drawl: ] Hey~ Glad to see that you made it. I was about to get chewed out if you didn't.

[apatheia]

[Aside from the regularly scheduled and ordered contact, 2B wasn't really the type to go out of her way to communicate with her operator. Still, the fact that she hadn't heard anything after having landed a while ago now was... pretty weird.

Then again, this was 13O.]

I'm surprised you weren't already. [TBH... From her end of the feed, he'll be able to see the good ol' City Ruins along with a few harmless stubbies wandering about. For a post-apocalyptic ruin, it looks pretty peaceful.] Anyways, I have nothing to report thus far.

[eusford]

[ Her first response earns a grin. ]

You know I have to lie so I don't embarrass myself in front of everyone. [ Not like it was a secret, nor was it something unexpected, 13O deserved it. ]

Huh? You've been down there for awhile and nothing's happened? How boring.

[apatheia]

[She shakes her head. It's a wonder the Commander still keeps him on operator duty honestly...]

Whether or not a mission is boring is irrelevant. [Although with nothing to investigate at the moment, it makes being here feel like a waste of time.] Have you been able to gather any new intel?

[oneirism]

so maybe stuff with that one soul bond au we did???

or where he's a history teacher and she's like his overworked assistant or something. or just general college au stuff, i just love college au stuff too much...

[eusford]

okay but imagine this

history teacher meeting his assistant and then end up being soulmates au
or maybe she's a student in a huge ass classroom so when the world goes in color for the first time crowley's lowkey panicking because wHO OUT OF THIS WHOLE CLASS IS THE SOULMATE

[oneirism]

oh my god. this is brilliant

lets go with the second option, and then lapis can like... sweat intensely at the back of the class and lowkey panic too. then spends most of the class just staring at all the colors

[eusford]

[ Crowley has spent all his life in a world of black and white with various shades of gray in between. And for the most part he's in full belief that that is how his life will end—without a hint of color, not even something as vague as something so pigmented as the color of his eyes. (At least that's what his mother tells him, and others have complimented, about his eyes. "A brilliant shade of blue.") He can't complain too much about it, of course. He doesn't feel jealous when his friends tell him of how their life was filled with color the moment they had laid eyes on their soulmate, he's far too busy balancing teaching with his social life and honestly he's content with not knowing what certain colors truly look like.

Though he's heard stories of the ocean, been told how that it's something unimaginable, and perhaps he's a little upset over not being able to experience that much.

But, again, he'll live. What's more important now is getting through this first day of his World History class scheduled at 8 AM sharp. He has a new syllabus to hand out, a whole row of names he'll force himself to remember by the end of this week, reading chapters to assign, and a whole new lecture that will start them off on the right track. It's the dullest of days for any start to a semester and he's all too familiar of it, which is why when he glances over the crowd of people the smile he graces them is a tad bit wry. ] Good morning~ I'm sure everyone's ready to go right back to bed, right? [ Lighthearted, sarcastic, his smile grows into something a little more natural, giving each face a second's worth of attention before he stops in a certain area.

There. That's when he sees color slowly begin to bleed into his vision, starting with someone's desk that creeps into the carpet and begins to spread across the walls. It's a gradual change, certain that the room will soon enough be engulfed in what he's been missing his entire life by the end of this lecture and he swallows hard. Pretends to be calm, heart rattling against his rib cage as he wonders just who is the cause of this—

His soulmate? One of students is his soulmate?

Remaining professional, going down the lists of names, he announces them one by one before staring for a second longer at their face, to see if they'll spring to life with color. Perhaps they'll react when he calls his name? But that's probably asking for too much. ]

Next is... Lapis Fathalla?

[skyfarer]

i couldn't decide so just have gran
bite me thicc daddy

[eusford]

[ It was engraved into vampire law that they were not to posses their own personal livestock. Humans were pushed to the brink of extinction, thousands from possible extinction, and it was the vampires responsibility to keep them under their protection for survival. It's only the natural order of things—the strong protecting the weak, even if the humans claimed over and over again that their way of life was "inhumane". But why call it that when they should just adapt like any other living creature?

To Crowley it doesn't quite matter, but he certainly doesn't have a death wish so he's not going to argue against the increase of humans being guarded within his faction. But that doesn't mean that he's going to obey every little law that the majority agreed to within the vampire community; when the scent of a particular human reaches him there's a certain level of possessiveness that hits him like a truck.

Chess and Horn won't deny him, they'd never object to the possibility of being able to share between a human with their "Lord", so they didn't even so much blink when he ordered the two to bring Gran to his quarters. (It's just that fucking office room because vampires don't sleep ho.) Already tied to keep him from "misbehaving", as most humans tended to do under these circumstances. Not surprising but still tiring, and Crowley's not particularly in any mood of chasing down after prey. ]

Ah, sorry. [ He speaks with an alarming amount of indifference, completely unapologetic, as if he's not speaking to someone who was forcefully tied up and brought to him with his retainers positioned at the door. ] I hope that Chess and Horn didn't scare you too much. [ He relaxes against his desk, arms crossed across his chest. ] But you see, something about you is different.

[ That glint in his eyes indicates danger, a toothy grin far too apparent as he stares down at the smaller individual. ]

Mind explaining that? Though I should not that if you want to try being smart I won't have any control of her. [ He points to Chess, who outright pouts. ] She has a large appetite, you see, and it'd be troublesome figuring out what to do with you if she drunk you dry.

[skyfarer]

[ look, just about anyone in his position would be... upset, to put it lightly? following a pretty sudden capture, being tied up and roughly dragged to some pretentious vampire office can't mean anything good. he's not sure why his presence is specifically requested, either; they were looking for him, that much is sure, though the two vampires serving as his escorts clearly prefer to tease than reveal any actual information.

at the very least, they could spare him the ropes? he's fairly positive he can't hurt anyone bare-handed, anyway -- nor outrun a vampire, for that matter? lazy ho.

crowley doesn't look particularly apologetic about it, neither; nor does he sound like it, his speech given clearly for the sake of formalities rather than trying to be genuine.

he's too busy staring at the taller man's fangs to truly process any of this, anyway. so long?? ]

Huh? Oh, no. I'm not scared. [ try irritated, though the other's question does make him quirk an eyebrow. different -- it's not the first time he's heard this, nor does it surprise him that a vampire can tell. still -- it's not exactly information he's willing to reveal with his life on the line, either.

it puts someone else in danger, too -- on top of possibly being damning to him in the first place.

so he's silent, for a few moments, gaze wandering from crowley to all the walls and details of his office. there's really no good answer to that, is there? ]

She can't, can she? [ he speaks up, after the pause, humming in thought. ] Humanity is low on numbers as it is. Killing me here wouldn't do you any favors, right?

[ it's a bit of a long shot, but it's not as if he's got anything to lose. except his life. ]

Anyway, you've got it all wrong. I'm pretty normal, see?

[eusford]

[ Irritated sounds right, logical, and Crowley can understand why. However the question of how this human felt wasn't one done out of genuine consideration of how he felt, but more along the lines of simply aggravating him more.

The hesitation makes it so obvious that he is hiding something the vampire has to force himself not to laugh. ] We left the decorating as is when the humans abandoned this place, so it's pretty dull. [ Not that Crowley had much of a sense of what is and isn't beautiful. ]

Hm? [ He hums, taking a step closer with a quirked brow. ]

Under my command she's free to do as she pleases, bending some of the rules isn't anything terrible. We wouldn't even get a day's worth of sun exposure as punishment.

[ Maybe a cut on blood but that's Chess' problem. Crowley was content with little intake as long as he got by. ]

Wrong. [ And like that Crowley lifts his foot and stomps down onto Gran's thigh. Not hard enough to shatter bones but there's going to be a bruises, without a doubt, the next day. ] You're the only human in the room and there's something about that smells off, as if you're balancing back and forth between two beings. [ There's not a hint of threat in his tone, eyes and smile remaining mildly playful at best. ] So why don't you stop lying to me before I really have to punish you?

[eusford]

( continued from here )

It's not like I have an endless amount of options.
A lot of people get turned off by the whole vampire thing. Surprising, I know.

She's sleeping like a baby, tomorrow may be a rough time but for now she's more than just content.

[brickinthewall]

you decided to text me right after you hooked up?

aw you shouldn't have

you should put on body glitter. they'd probably dig that shit.

[eusford]

I thought I should tell my best girl.

Wow are you trying to help me get laid? I've already heard the rumors about that work of fiction, I'd honestly rather just have my head cut off.

[brickinthewall]

you just need someone who will go "need me a freak like that" when you say vampire

and of course i am i'm your best girl. wing... woman. whatever.

[eusford]

( continued from here )

Did I ever say you were not? I just said that I wasn't aware, meaning that my favoritism towards you comes naturally. Or that's how I like to see it.
My one and only.

Honestly speaking? It was a little embarrassing.
But my lips are sealed.

thanks for the continuation! c:

[floofing]

I hear all of what you're saying and it makes sense to me, but I'd rather be called your favorite than hear I'm not your favorite. That's all.

[ he's practically pouting over his phone. even if it's all true, he wants to hear that he's the favorite! over and over. he's not a narcissist, he's just confident. or something. ]

Now I'm really worried! Please tell me what you can remember? There's no evidence of it anywhere, right?
I'm glad I can count on you. How did this even happen to me? There must have been something funny in my drink that only affects beautiful kitsune. That's the only explanation.

np!

[eusford]

Alright~ Alright~

But you just told me not to say anything? You can't just go about and contradict yourself, I seriously won't be able to understand you at this rate.
By the way you're basically nude in someone else's yard, right? Wave your hand.

[floofing]

Hey, I'm allowed to change my mind! I'm a quick-thinking fox when you think about it.
But I'm also a fox who regrets last night already.

You want me to wave my hand? That's it?

Like this?

[ there's. there's no accompanying video or photo. he's just wondering if Crowley is across the street or something. of course, Kaden is hiding behind some bushes so he can pretend he's not completely indecent. ]

[fragmento]

I

don't

care

which

ugly

you're

bumping

right

now

PICK UP THE PHONE TRAMP

I NEVER FUCKING SAW THID FAKDFAKSFJKF this crowley leaving jacopo on read irl

[eusford]

You're killing the mood each time you call, you know?

STOP

[fragmento]

Good.

[eusford]

What is it that you want?

If it's just me then wait your turn.